Obituary – Uncle Aseng

On 13th July, my phone rang on 5.00 AM in the morning. I noticed the call because i was awake because of my gastritis, vomiting, and cold sweat. Soon after that, bunch of text messages came in. Couple of hours later, i checked the phone and found out that my sister was trying to inform me that “my uncle – my Daddy younger brother – passed away this morning”.

It was certainly a shock. I first met him when i visited Jakarta before i move to Bandung with my Dad. It was a short meeting. The second i met him was about a month ago on my cousin’s wedding party. What impressed me is the second meeting. I can not say much about his life, but i can certainly share what i feel when i met him.

Its no secret in Asia countries that age and marriage is sometimes over related – in my opinion. Once you pass a certain age number, the pressure to marriage is bigger than ever. Not to mention when you are attending one of its ceremony tradition, a wedding.

During that time, i learnt that my uncle was single. He is my Daddy younger brother, so he must be more than 50s. He was very modest – always riding motorcycle everywhere. The most important thing is he was happy, very happy. He told us that happiness is the important thing, not the marital status or else. And i believe it because i see it in his face and in his life. I feel the happiness inside him. That was such as short meeting but meaningful one.

When i saw his face in the mourn house, his face was a bit dark – natural body decomposition process, but his face was in peace. My cousin said it feels like “He is just sleeping”. That made me feels that this might be the way, his time has come. It made me feel peace and sincerely happy and wish his next journey – after life we known – will be smooth and of course, happy.

On the next day, i learnt that he was helping his neighbours by paying their debt to others and always been helpful in any cases. His neighbours came to mourn house to pay him the last respect. His action was a surprise for us. Himself was not a rich man, but he was helping others with his capability.

I heard people used to say that sincerity and kindness is rare, but most of the time, we are the one who fail to see them. This is a one of the example – a reminder for me. Human is a complex living creatures, its very hard to know a person, yet judging them.


I sincerely wish My Uncle will find this true happiness in his life and next life.

I sincerely wish all living creatures can find their true happiness, now and then.

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